THE ADVENTURES OF JOHN A. STRONAUT
BotB Academy Bulletins
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235021 :: 2026.03.15 7:56pm ::
  
  lasersphaser, damifortune, sean, Webriprob, Ogladian, djtakataka, Super_Femicom and agargara liēkd this
Me, Agargara, and Webriprob came up with the idea of making something like Problem Sleuth, but in BOTB form. Problem Sleuth is Homestuck's predecessor, where readers submitted their own commands for characters to do which were then written into the comic, often leading to unexpected results.
For this battle series, you submit a command for a character to do based on what happened in the last page, and then when battle time rolls around, you select a command to take, and then make a 256x256 panel of what happens next, alongside a caption about what happens, if you wish. The winner of the battle becomes the official "next page", and then you submit commands following that page, and rinse and repeat.
Without further ado, let's start off with PAGE 1! submit commands in the replies.

"your name is JOHN A. STRONAUT. it is your 56TH DAY ABOARD SPACE STATION S.L.U.G., and you are awaiting to be dispatched for your NEXT MISSION. What do you do next?"
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235022 :: 2026.03.15 7:56pm ::
  
  Ogladian and djtakataka liēkd this
John: retrieve arms from space chest.
 
 
Level 29 Chipist
agargara
 
 
 
post #235023 :: 2026.03.15 7:59pm ::
  
  Ogladian, djtakataka and raptorgirl liēkd this
Awesome, thanks so much for making this idea a reality!

Command:
> press random buttons
 
 
Level 21 Chipist
djtakataka
 
 
 
post #235024 :: 2026.03.15 8:14pm ::
  
  Lasertooth liēkd this
such a cool idea!!!

Command:
John: look out to the starry sea and gather your thoughts
 
 
Level 16 Pixelist
Ogladian
 
 
post #235032 :: 2026.03.15 9:51pm ::
  
  Lasertooth liēkd this
Ahhh! can't wait for the battle connected to this :)

John: Double check that all your badges are safe and sound under your S.L.U.G approved frameless mattress
 
 
Level 11 Chipist
maxi0222
 
 
post #235033 :: 2026.03.15 10:02pm ::
really coooool let's make a botb canon command john open up his macbook pro m1 2020 and starts chiptuning with the PC speaker in furnace, creating what will soon be known as the first song to give birth
 
 
Level 26 Mixist
Lasertooth
 
 
 
post #235047 :: 2026.03.16 1:11am ::
  
  Ogladian, Jangler, retrokid104 and djtakataka liēkd this
John: Restlessly refresh your Mission Inbox.
 
 
Level 23 Pixelist
The Diad
 
 
 
post #235056 :: 2026.03.16 3:38am ::
  
  djtakataka liēkd this
John: eat spaceship
 
 
Level 23 Chipist
retrokid104
 
 
 
post #235072 :: 2026.03.16 7:49am ::
  
  Xaser liēkd this
John: Primary objective: Kill the Stroggs.
Secondary Objective: Destroy the Big Gun
 
 
Level 15 Chipist
Da Flarf
 
 
post #235076 :: 2026.03.16 9:27am ::
  
  cessna, djtakataka and fortuna0800 liēkd this
John: empty the urine tank into space
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235155 :: 2026.03.17 2:14pm :: edit 2026.03.17 2:18pm ::
  
  Lasertooth, cessna, agargara, Ogladian and djtakataka liēkd this
PAGE 2, by OGLADIAN. Submit commands below!
 
 
Level 21 Chipist
djtakataka
 
 
 
post #235157 :: 2026.03.17 2:26pm ::
  
  Maxi, cessna, agargara and Ogladian liēkd this
John: break the screen and spin on the floor like a lunatic
 
 
Level 31 Chipist
damifortune
 
 
 
post #235160 :: 2026.03.17 2:48pm ::
  
  djtakataka and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Stare into the void of the spiral-shaped glyph.
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235161 :: 2026.03.17 2:55pm ::
  
  mirageofher, Maxi, damifortune, agargara, djtakataka and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Take a closer look at the yellow symbol... it looks different compared to the rest
 
 
Level 29 Chipist
agargara
 
 
 
post #235172 :: 2026.03.17 4:59pm ::
  
  Wegfrei, damifortune and djtakataka liēkd this
John: Lick the screen
 
 
Level 22 Performist
STARLONG
 
 
 
post #235177 :: 2026.03.17 5:27pm ::
  
  djtakataka, agargara and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Power cycle the monitor, that should fix the glitchy inbox!
 
 
Level 23 Pixelist
The Diad
 
 
 
post #235213 :: 2026.03.18 3:47am ::
  
  Ogladian and agargara liēkd this
John: play free cell
 
 
Level 11 Signalist
Maxi
 
 
post #235355 :: 2026.03.20 10:16am :: edit 2026.03.20 10:18am ::
John: draw on the mission inbox except you don't have something to draw
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235363 :: 2026.03.20 2:15pm ::
  
  djtakataka, cessna, Ogladian and agargara liēkd this
PAGE 3, by raptorgirl. Submit commands below!
 
 
Level 22 Performist
STARLONG
 
 
 
post #235365 :: 2026.03.20 2:59pm ::
  
  DanonZer, Lasertooth and Ogladian liēkd this
John: check your phone! Or whatever portable screen you have. One screen isn't enough!
 
 
Level 29 Chipist
agargara
 
 
 
post #235366 :: 2026.03.20 3:22pm ::
  
  DanonZer, djtakataka and Ogladian liēkd this
John: eat the banana
 
 
Level 15 Mixist
DanonZer
 
 
post #235371 :: 2026.03.20 4:24pm ::
  
  Webriprob, djtakataka and Lasertooth liēkd this
John: Report the results of last mission to Reece Urcher
 
 
Level 23 Pixelist
The Diad
 
 
 
post #235372 :: 2026.03.20 4:41pm ::
  
  DanonZer and Ogladian liēkd this
Dang it, I keep missing these!

John: use turn signal
 
 
Level 11 Signalist
Maxi
 
 
post #235373 :: 2026.03.20 4:51pm ::
  
  Ogladian liēkd this
John: Sound design
 
 
Level 21 Chipist
djtakataka
 
 
 
post #235379 :: 2026.03.20 8:54pm :: edit 2026.03.20 8:54pm ::
  
  Webriprob and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Be the other guy
 
 
Level 28 Chipist
blower5
 
 
 
post #235380 :: 2026.03.20 9:19pm ::
  
  djtakataka, Ogladian and Lasertooth liēkd this
John: respond to spaceship alarm
 
 
Level 31 Chipist
damifortune
 
 
 
post #235381 :: 2026.03.20 9:40pm ::
  
  Stupe, djtakataka, DanonZer and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Blatantly ignore spaceship alarm
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235382 :: 2026.03.20 11:08pm ::
  
  damifortune, DanonZer and Ogladian liēkd this
John: pull spaceship alarm because you're bored
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235558 :: 2026.03.23 4:56pm ::
  
  cessna, DanonZer, damifortune, Ogladian and agargara liēkd this
PAGE 4, by djtakataka. Submit commands below!
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #235559 :: 2026.03.23 4:57pm ::
  
  damifortune, djtakataka and agargara liēkd this
John: Check if there are any parasitic organisms on or around you.
 
 
Level 29 Chipist
agargara
 
 
 
post #235560 :: 2026.03.23 5:20pm ::
  
  damifortune and djtakataka liēkd this
John: Feed your pet Space Lizard
 
 
Level 22 Performist
STARLONG
 
 
 
post #235563 :: 2026.03.23 6:08pm ::
  
  lasersphaser, damifortune and djtakataka liēkd this
John: Attempt to hide the strand hair. You know that having hair is tantamount to mutiny in Captain Urcher's eyes.
 
 
Level 21 Chipist
djtakataka
 
 
 
post #235567 :: 2026.03.23 7:38pm ::
  
  DanonZer and damifortune liēkd this
John: Observe continually updating space map and pinpoint exact location of the nearest Arby's
 
 
Level 10 XHBist
Fennel Tea
 
 
post #235571 :: 2026.03.23 7:55pm ::
  
  lasersphaser, cessna, Wegfrei, djtakataka, Ogladian, Twenty-Seven, DanonZer and damifortune liēkd this
John: take estrogen
 
 
Level 31 Chipist
damifortune
 
 
 
post #235577 :: 2026.03.23 10:37pm ::
  
  cessna, lasersphaser, djtakataka, retrokid104, DanonZer and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Water the top of your head to see if the hair sprout will grow
 
 
Level 28 Chipist
blower5
 
 
 
post #235578 :: 2026.03.23 11:31pm ::
  
  djtakataka, DanonZer and Ogladian liēkd this
John: fall over
 
 
Level 15 Mixist
DanonZer
 
 
post #235585 :: 2026.03.24 4:56am ::
  
  Wegfrei, djtakataka and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Disable gravity inside the ship for shits and giggles
 
 
Level 11 Signalist
Maxi
 
 
post #235641 :: 2026.03.25 9:52am ::
John: summon an egg. not one, but exactly 172.135791357913579 eggs (decimals included)
 
 
Level 29 Chipist
agargara
 
 
 
post #237966 :: 2026.04.29 8:09pm ::
  
  djtakataka and lasersphaser liēkd this
John: take out one of the DIATRIBES and eat it
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #238034 :: 2026.04.30 3:19pm ::
  
  Ogladian and djtakataka liēkd this
PAGE 5, by DanonZer. Submit commands below!
 
 
Level 21 Chipist
djtakataka
 
 
 
post #238035 :: 2026.04.30 3:25pm ::
  
  lasersphaser, damifortune, agargara, Ogladian and DanonZer liēkd this
Parasite: ping current location to home planet
 
 
Level 15 Mixist
DanonZer
 
 
post #238060 :: 2026.05.01 4:00am ::
  
  djtakataka liēkd this
John: Drink Space TeaTM
 
 
Level 29 Chipist
agargara
 
 
 
post #238062 :: 2026.05.01 5:23am ::
  
  djtakataka and DanonZer liēkd this
Parasite: Infect a new host
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #238107 :: 2026.05.01 4:55pm ::
  
  DanonZer, lasersphaser and djtakataka liēkd this
John?: Feel compelled to have a friendly conversation with Reece Urcher, preferably in-person.
 
 
Level 24 Chipist
SRB2er
 
 
 
post #238160 :: 2026.05.03 1:47am :: edit 2026.05.03 1:47am ::
  
  DanonZer liēkd this
john: take a peek at that mysterious long hallway
 
 
Level 22 Performist
STARLONG
 
 
 
post #238195 :: 2026.05.03 10:37am ::
  
  cessna liēkd this
John: fortnight dance!
 
 
Level 16 Pixelist
Ogladian
 
 
post #238199 :: 2026.05.03 11:46am ::
  
  lasersphaser liēkd this
John: Inspect the easily forgotten space chest in the corner of your space room
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #238217 :: 2026.05.03 3:23pm :: edit 2026.05.03 3:35pm ::
  
  djtakataka and Ogladian liēkd this
Page 6, by lasersphaser. Submit commands below!
 
 
Level 15 Mixist
DanonZer
 
 
post #238219 :: 2026.05.03 3:28pm ::
  
  Maxi, djtakataka and Ogladian liēkd this
John: Ping... pong? Find someone on board the space station to play ping pong with
 
 
Level 19 Samplist
raptorgirl
 
 
 
post #238220 :: 2026.05.03 3:35pm ::
  
  Ogladian, DanonZer and djtakataka liēkd this
Scientists on Home Planet: Discuss findings with team.
 
 
Level 21 Chipist
djtakataka
 
 
 
post #238226 :: 2026.05.03 7:07pm ::
  
  lasersphaser, damifortune, agargara, STARLONG, Ogladian, Twenty-Seven and DanonZer liēkd this
Jane S.Cience: look around lab
 
 
Level 3 Playa
mrgutsybat
 
 
post #238265 :: 2026.05.04 5:35pm ::
eat something because john is hungry
 
 
Level 8 Chipist
WeevilFan123
 
 
post #238294 :: 2026.05.05 8:27am ::
  
  lasersphaser, damifortune, DanonZer and Ogladian liēkd this
space weevil: zoop
 
 
Level 11 Signalist
Maxi
 
 
post #238545 :: 2026.05.07 6:29pm ::
  
  lasersphaser, damifortune, agargara, Ogladian and djtakataka liēkd this
John: find an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John looking at an alternate universe that contains John cooking a fish
also eat something I know John is hungry
 
 

LOGIN or REGISTER to add your own comments!